The flow of time

It's been awhile since I've posted dear reader and I have much to discuss. Life has been very kind and has pushed me high above the dark seas of my past. I feel awaken to a new existence that I never truly thought possible for myself. I've seen others in fleeting moments of bliss and have always thought that holding onto these moments is like holding onto the details of a dream as it slips uncontrollably from your grasp. Life's favor has indeed been great and I feel so blessed to finally find some solace from the storm that has fractured my mind and soul.

New life is beating inside the one I have joined myself forever and soon his cry will tear asunder the quite bliss that we are experiencing. Removal from solitude doesn't bother me as much as the thought that accompanies the arrival of my son. The knowledge of being looked upon for guidance is more terrifying than any quest to slay even the greatest of dragons. The weight of responsibly is something that I will never flee from but it seems one of the most daunting tasks that I've forged my mind against. The understanding that single moments are pivotal to the development and success of a psyche. That eyes will look to me to provide such calm surroundings when my mind refuses to offer myself such an requested environment.

I used to dream of being alone. Of standing in a room with no windows and no doors. Placed in this space by hands that where not my own. I used to think how safe and comforting this room would be. I used to wish for nothing more than the darkness that this room would provide. Now I dream of a hand, outstretched seeking mine, eyes looking up with a smile as the sun rises and blankets out the darkness with it's warm blinding glow.